Something You May Need To Hear...

      As I sit here on a cool September evening, I think to myself on what I should write about. I could write about why the skies blue, or why plants grow. And if I did that I probably would put you to sleep, or you'd click right off and go back to whatever else you were doing. I don't want to do that, I want to write something you can relate to. Whether you’re a young adult like me, a teen starting High School, a Parent, grandparent, or even just a younger kid! I want to reach out to all of you! Give you something that jumps out to you, or makes you want to do better than you did today. I don't know just something!

       Then out of the blue, something came to me. What if I talk about people in general. I know this may be a bland, but it will make sense later. I want to talk about feelings you may be dealing with now, or not really knowing how to deal with. I want to talk about how trials affect our daily lives. How our choices affect our lives, and how to accept our choices we've already made. Mainly, I want you to feel like you're not alone, to make sure you know that people go through things too. And from personal experience, I think knowing a person who understands is way better than not having anyone at all. 

      The other day, I was in a work meeting, and this meeting was held to see what things as a team we needed to improve. As I sat there, I was pondering things that were being said, and trying to find something that I needed to improve on as well. Then we watched a video from Brene Brown on Empathy. We were talking about our customer service at the Clinic (vet) I work at, and how we could improve. As a Team we were focusing on the difference of Empathy, and Sympathy. So we watched this video (which I will leave the link to) and the one thing that reached out to me the most was this "the truth is, rarely, can a response make something better, what makes something better is connection." and WOW, this is hard. Just think about this for a second. I think this is something that needs to be focused on in this generation. We need to focus and realize,

WE

CAN'T

FIX

EVERYTHING.

      I myself have found myself coming down this road of perfection, or thinking that I'm not going to be helpful for my friend unless I have an answer. Sometimes though, no answer is answer enough. Or just having the receiving party understand this subject. And usually the receiving party just wants you to be there, not wanting an answer, just wanting you to be understanding of how they are struggling, or just for you to be willing to sit there with them. Being there for them is an answer enough. I am a firm believer that not everything has an answer, but if it does, it'll come when it needs to. We are never give trials that are too hard, the harder the trial, the stronger you'll become.

      A friend of mine, named Abby, was having a conversation with me about how she was thinking to herself about how she felt like she was a "average" human. She started to explain that someone she was talking to for the first time started to explain what they've been up to. How they were traveling a lot and seeing parts of the world she hasn't seen. Then that person asked what interests she had, and things she has been up to. She continued to say she liked fitness, and that she's been going to school to be a bomb surgeon... okay... I may have added that end part.

      So I asked her why does that make her "average". And she said because she's not traveling and seeing new places. Abby continued and said she feels very average because she's going to school and working out just like any other 20 year old. In this moment I tried empathizing with her, but then I had some thoughts of my own. I asked her if I could share some with her, she politely agreed. I asked her what the definition of "AVERAGE" was. And it's somewhat hard to explain that right? Your mind, or at least mine went to "normal", but how do you define that word? These words I kind of hate. They are words that every person you meet will have a different opinion on "what their normal or average is". 

      I continued and said, to me, my "normal" is going to work at a Vet Clinic 4 times a week, and hanging out with my family and friends for the rest. Abby's normal is school and fitness as of right now. See, everyone's quote on quote normal is different than the next. I said to Abby "you are not an average person, you are at a different part of your race than someone else. No one is an average person because we are all very different. The person you are talking to probably thinks that you going to pre-med and liking fitness is cool". We are the hardest on ourselves than others. I know that’s a cheesy saying, but to be fully honest with you, the cheesier the better.

      What it all comes down to is, we cannot compare ourselves, because it takes all our joy away. It takes your growth and smashes it into pieces, because you look at it as if you're doing something wrong. And the only thing wrong is the fact, you think something is wrong with you and what you are doing. Live your life as You, the smart and courageous person you are. Don't compare yourself to the next guy, it will do you know good. 

      Have someone you can have these conversations with, ask questions, be open to change. Be willing to listen, have an open ear no matter who is talking. Be non-judgemental towards others, even if you don't like them. It shouldn't matter who it is, you should be kind to as many people as possible. I saw this one sticker on my hydro flask, I know basic, but it says "Humankind, Be both" and honestly I love it. Kind is literally in our name as individuals, Humankind, what an amazing thing to notice. Whoever made that sticker, props to you. It really got me thinking, and I really love it. 

      And if you find yourself not having that person to talk to, reach out to someone. Whether it someone you barely talk to, or its someone you haven't talked to in a while, do it. Serve someone else, help someone else, because you get out of it however much you put into it. Treat others the way you want to be treated, you've heard of that one right? It's the same thing. I also am here for you, I hope you all know that by now. If you need an outlet, talk to me, reach out. I can't tell how many people are struggling, and neither can anyone else, unless you say something. It's all up to you at this point. I read self help books to help me, and I reach out to those around me not a lot, but I also try to help others if I know they are struggling. Just have an open mind and heart towards others, be the bigger person.

  I hope this helped you in one way or another. One of my goals in life is to be there for other people as much as I can. I love when I can help someone, doesn't matter if it's a small task, or a deep conversation. I am here for it all, and I will not leave ya, even in the darkest of times. I will try my best to help, whether its an answer, or just to empathize with you. If you would like to write in the comments what you would like to hear about on my blog please let me know. I would appreciate it a lot!

Let's help each other.

Love everyone,

No matter what.

Even if you don’t agree with them, love them. Love them for their choices, love them for them. Love is one of the strongest ways of making a change. Nothing can change without a little bit of love. Love is that secret ingredient that I think we as a whole generation are missing. 

So what are we waiting for?! It all starts with you, so what will YOU do?